I’ve been on a lot of listing appointments.
I’ve walked in on “adult photo shoots.”
I’ve seen bone-fide hoarders who had aisles in their living room walled off with 5 foot high piles of the Weekly World News and laundry.
I’ve seen motorcycles undergoing routine maintenance in the family room.
I’ve been hit on, insulted and shocked.
Through all of that, nothing bothers me more than a home owner who ignores their dog while he jumps, drools and claws on me.
Don’t get me wrong. I like dogs. I grew up with dogs. Dogs are great. It’s their owners who are idiots.
I just got back from an appointment where a seller had two, little yappy dogs. When she opened the door, she moved aside so the dogs could “say hello” and get to know my new sport coat. After a few minutes of barking and mauling, she thoughtfully moved them into her bedroom.
Five minutes later, as she showed me her bedroom, one of the dogs, in a stunning display of acrobatics, did a double jump, hitting the bed first and then landing on my back. After the third Double Lindsey, the owner took a break from telling me how her exercise bike and treadmill didn’t really take up that much room in the middle of her bedroom, to tell the dog to “sit.” He didn’t.
As we moved out to the kitchen, we sat down and started to talk about the home. Within seconds, the other dog buried her nose into my crotch while the acrobat made sweet love to my leg.
I can only fake a smile so long.
I got the listing, but lost a great sport coat.